how we act alone when we don’t feel like we have witnesses.. that is the genuine self.. me walking around my room punching the air talking to myself in a bad southern accent, that’s ME baby. you’re never going to know me like i know me. haha.
It’s come to my attention that I have not yet made a post
about Farmer’s Market Hot™.
Farmer’s Market Hot is a specific kind of aesthetic that is
the result of me watching Orphan’s Black and trying to describe the hotness of
Cal to others.
See my point?
Farmer’s Market Hot is a wholesome kind of hot. Rugged but approachable.
It’s not the kind of hot where you immediately go, “Oh my god they’re so
perfect, I want to take them home and photograph them/tear their clothes off.” That’s
for later.
This is the kind of hot for people who would visit the farmer’s
market to buy some organic cheeses on their way to pick up their kids from
their Creativity Through Music class. It’s the look that says “I’m here to
support our local beekeepers.” You see them and it makes you want to settle down.
You want to do your taxes with them, raise dogs together.
It’s borderline hipster without the elitism and irony,
borderline country without the sound of Tim McGraw. If they’re white, racist
shit like dreads automatically disqualifies them.
Guys will most likely be stubbly, or bearded, but not to the
point of lumberjack. Think Chris Evans in between Marvel movies.
Pictured: a man who wants to buy artisan bread from a stall
and be polite to the merchants.
Imagine a woman with a sunflower tattoo, wearing a high-low
dress and clunky dependable boots, holding a dog’s leash while she waits at the
knife sharpening booth. Imagine a man wearing flannel and holding a baby while
talking about ethical alternatives to quinoa.
Farmer’s Market Hot™.
Add this to your vocabulary.
It’s that time of the year again, so I felt the need to bring this back.
When somebody says that “a man likes to feel like a man,” all I hear is “A man likes to feel superior to you and it’s your job to make him believe it.”
Someone said this to me once, that a man needs to feel like a man, I replied “well I’m not stopping him” and had to watch this fragile creature try to explain to me that my strong personality could demean men.
Like, if I have to pretend you are a strong man and cater to that then clearly you’re not that strong dude.
This post has the most weapons grade dick energy ive ever seen.